Perfect love casts out fear. It does. So why do I fear? As of late I've been faced with a nice dose of reality...about me. As I was thinking about an overwhelming situation (to me), I thought and prayed, "Lord, I just cannot do this! It is impossible for me! I'm sorry Lord, I'm not what I should be, I'm not as strong as I should be, and I don't have what it takes to do THIS!" Then I cried, saddened by the awful thought of my own failure and inability to be what God wanted me to be. The entire day was miserable. In my heart of hearts, in the deepest corner of my soul...is a longing, a simmering fire...to please my Lord. When I realized there may be something the Lord wants me to do...that I simply COULD NOT HANDLE...it just devastated me.
I've thought on this all week. I've prayed and apologized to the Lord for my weakness, my inabilities, my failure to be what He needed me to be. As I prayed the other day, once again pouring out my heart to God, in the stillness of my tears, the Lord impressed upon me another perspective I had not thought of.
God has always known my insecurites. He knows my feelings of failure. He knows my weaknesses, my strengths. He knows about my emotions, my desires, He knows my heart and soul. He knows what I am truly afraid of and He even knows why. And yet, my heavenly Father believes in me. He is all-knowing...and He believes in....ME! Would He ask of me something beyond my ability to achieve? Would He ask me to do something He already knew I couldn't do?? Absolutely not. Therefore, if He asks something of me...although I feel insecure and fearful, weak and unable...if He asks me, then He believes I am able. He believes I am strong enough. If my Creator, the One who knows me, believes in me...why should I fear? I know He knows me better than I know myself...so if the Lord believes in me, He is right and I am wrong. I am able to do His will for my life no matter how difficult it may seem or He would not ask it of me. I really trust Him. I believe He loves me. I believe His word. How can I fear with a love so real and so strong?