tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-53189585686266110522024-03-06T01:42:02.977-05:00A Life Worth LivingAmy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.comBlogger92125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-70954566000147507372011-02-04T21:19:00.006-05:002011-02-04T22:41:17.743-05:00Grace...<a style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsnqJo4MVKTuwW92K_OI4vqzg7WdXRM5sRCHo4PioZ1GpLghM2u7m4PppgtrFCy_69HOh4lXWPuXAaDUTeFMfx_T-ojCY0rBpocQIZoE-yLmlemldtQ8hbLaNoc9mslm_qp8UVlbaNzuU/s1600/crying.jpeg"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 183px; height: 275px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsnqJo4MVKTuwW92K_OI4vqzg7WdXRM5sRCHo4PioZ1GpLghM2u7m4PppgtrFCy_69HOh4lXWPuXAaDUTeFMfx_T-ojCY0rBpocQIZoE-yLmlemldtQ8hbLaNoc9mslm_qp8UVlbaNzuU/s320/crying.jpeg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5570040579366531842" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><br />In my life I have found some things are not as simple as they seem. The verse in the Bible that says, "Let your speech be alway with GRACE, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man."</span><br /><br />Grace is defined as: 1. Elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action. 2. A pleasing or attractive quality. 3. Favor or good will. 4. A manifestation of favor, especially by a superior. 5. Mercy, clemency, pardon.<br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);"><br /><br />This was only the first 5 definitions but you get the point. Our speech...what we say to one another. How we speak to our friends, family, strangers, enemies, students we may teach, children, elderly, EVERY MAN...our words should be seasoned with grace, everything we say.<br /><br />Grace.<br /><br />Do we have grace for those we come in contact with? What of the fallen? What of the girl who is loose with her standards? Do our words portray to her that we favour her, we have forgiven her, does she feel she has any reason to even try again? Will she find grace and pardon in our words or condemnation and no hope.<br /><br />Grace. Some have called it "unmerited favor"...for we do nothing to deserve it. If we've done nothing to deserve it...in simple logic then, we can't do anything to NOT deserve it...it is after all Grace.<br /><br />When we look at others because of what we have heard or seen...and do not offer grace to them...we are a stumbling block to them. Our Lord has left us here to love people, unconditionally, and to offer them grace. When the woman taken in adultery was brought before Jesus, he said, "Neither do I condemn thee, go and sin no more." He didn't have to teach her what was wrong...she knew. We do not have to sit down with the fallen and point out all of their mistakes and flaws...they already know. We need to offer grace and unconditional love. No matter how well you know someone, you may not understand everything.<br /><br />Here in Belize, there is a lot of teenage pregnancy. One of the first questions asked the girls when they come in is, "Have you been sold?" What would make a mother so desperate that she would SELL HER DAUGHTER!!?? I don't fully know, but I suspicion that she was sold, and therefore believes it to be ok. Who will offer that mother grace for her guilt? Who will offer the daughter grace...who will love them as Christ would if He were still on earth?<br /><br />If incest occurs, the mother is left penniless with many children to raise. Many times she will stay with the abuser because he is the breadwinner. If she were to turn him into the authorities, their family name would be ruined. So it is kept quiet, brushed under the rug.<br /><br />Girls are forced into relationships at an early age. Some as young as 11 and 12. Their purity lost. Their view of love forever tainted by guilt. I would like to believe that this forcing is only happening in third world countries, but I am not naive. This happens in America too.<br /><br />Who will offer grace? Who will have the right words to say that are seasoned with salt and grace? Salt is for cleansing and preserving...there is no condemnation in this verse...only grace and unconditional love. Who will know how they "ought to answer every man"? Do you know how to offer grace to the wounded...or do you remain silent for fear of saying the wrong thing? If so...the wounded walk right out the doors with the same pain and guilt they came with. We all need to learn how to love them, to accept them, to offer them grace without condemnation...may we learn to love how God loves.</span><span style="cursor: default;color:transparent;" id="hotword" name="hotword" onmouseover="this.style.cursor='default'" onmouseout="this.style.backgroundColor='transparent'" onclick="this.style.backgroundColor='#b5d5ff';return hotWord(this);" ><br /></span><div class="dndata"><span class="ital-inline"><span id="hotword"> </span></span></div>Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-61381297223723292132011-01-26T14:28:00.003-05:002011-01-26T14:49:13.568-05:00A new yearNow that January is here, I've been thinking about my life in the past year. What have I learned...have I grown as a person, a Christian? Who am I now that I wasn't a year ago? What have I learned about myself, about others?<br /><br />I've been in Belize for 14 months now. So much of who I am, is and will be determined by my life here on the mission field. Some times we change, whether we like it or not...because we must. So how have I changed and what have I learned about myself?<br /><br />I have learned...<br /><br />I can live with bugs, spiders, snakes, scorpions, bats...and really it's not a big deal anymore. When I first came I often thought, "How can I do this every single day?!" I was constantly killing ants...they were everywhere. They still are, but most of the time, (unless they are taking over the house) I just leave them alone...I don't have the time to kill ants 24/7.<br /><br />I have learned to live on "plan C" because I know that plan A and plan B usually don't work out. That was an adjustment! I like to plan things and to work THAT PLAN...but ya know what...sometimes the plan doesn't work out...and you MUST ADJUST! You have to. I have learned it is ok if things don't work out. I have learned to say "Oh well..." with a smile.<br /><br />I have learned that if I do not dwell on those things which I cannot get or do here...soon I forget what it is that I am doing without. Really. People ask me, "What can you not get down there?" and I cannot think of anything, because I've just learned to live without it.<br /><br />I have learned to cook many things from scratch. If I want a potato casserole (which I'm making today) I have to shred the potatoes and the cheese. Everything takes longer. Everything. A simple meal to cook in the states can take hours to put together here...because everything is done by YOU! A salad takes a long time because you must sanitize all the veggies in bleach water, wash each leaf of lettuce...it just takes time!<br /><br />I have learned the ache of lonliness. In that lonliness I have learned an aspect of the Lord I never experienced before. While praying and crying to God for months to know Him more, to know His heart and His mind...an intense loneliness came over me. God was silent. Then after weeks of this, I heard Him whisper into my soul..."Amy...my heart is lonely too. I ache for fellowship with those whom I love. Yet, the people I love and gave my Son for...ignore me and never speak to me. You asked to know My heart and mind...I am lonely."<br /><br />So many other things....<br /><br />I hope in this next year to learn more. To learn more about helping hurting people. How to teach the wounded. How to help others heal....<br /><br />What an honor to serve our King. To represent Him to those who are hurting. Mine truly is A Life Worth Living.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-56949873130846337092010-06-28T16:43:00.003-04:002010-06-28T17:51:24.726-04:00Living the lifeMissionary kids. MK'S. Kids growing up in a foreign land, with no familiar faces. Kids who stand out from all other kids their age. They are a different color, speak different...look different. And how do these children cope? What do they do for fun? How do they adjust to another culture? I've had mothers ask me, "Aren't you afraid for your children? I mean they will grow up outside<br />of America?" Here is my answer...<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKKC73-ePd9TVI_2pP-LjhCfvkCFmNZQvQICAouKhP5D5zoRVOVvbfI4ayP_g3hyCbo0FLRiRF2CxP-pS4V39LZSIWC7DgxhYTX-13BVlEPIZaV_f40tn7yQXIY6xqe0WaqRe7B0gHx6A/s1600/IMG_0509.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKKC73-ePd9TVI_2pP-LjhCfvkCFmNZQvQICAouKhP5D5zoRVOVvbfI4ayP_g3hyCbo0FLRiRF2CxP-pS4V39LZSIWC7DgxhYTX-13BVlEPIZaV_f40tn7yQXIY6xqe0WaqRe7B0gHx6A/s400/IMG_0509.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5487931242756896226" border="0" /></a><br />Here is Joey, creative king of our house. He gathered some palm leaves and set them up (somehow) then borrowed a couple of clothes pins off of the line, hung up a blanket...and here he is, in his space ship heading for another adventure.<br /><br />The safest place for anyone is in the center of God's will. I am not afraid for my children. Yes, there are scary things that happen here. There are murders, drug trafficing, corrupt police, child abuse, just like any other country, including America. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfl9HC-ge9gmNxSzW0lKxNrSNjamt6d_ZEYMGPC6PyomHw45QQiCzX6t2vX6RhEmfsGCJyd1Odhha0qP7rnGXpBgPfWAisKAVSlievv8q6SD37VWcU-SavopEofcoOYmA6oTm8cd3P4Bc/s1600/IMG_0505.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfl9HC-ge9gmNxSzW0lKxNrSNjamt6d_ZEYMGPC6PyomHw45QQiCzX6t2vX6RhEmfsGCJyd1Odhha0qP7rnGXpBgPfWAisKAVSlievv8q6SD37VWcU-SavopEofcoOYmA6oTm8cd3P4Bc/s400/IMG_0505.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5487931232333871986" border="0" /></a><br /><br />My children belong to God. They are missionary kids second to being Gods kids. I've read a poem before entitled "Children live what they learn". My children have lived and learned creativity! <br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEha_ElcDq5JsbM7QRbmDq4eMUF5E39vLM8ICmUZKi_42SW_9j30DcJcRy8hzuzi3I2gWjqOtjQ6z2s-niYma1ERVvUokjnF3UoYDqu-V0ewFii-qkY8-HF5U2emRSHK5H_5_nFAIn-T6_4/s1600/IMG_0504.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEha_ElcDq5JsbM7QRbmDq4eMUF5E39vLM8ICmUZKi_42SW_9j30DcJcRy8hzuzi3I2gWjqOtjQ6z2s-niYma1ERVvUokjnF3UoYDqu-V0ewFii-qkY8-HF5U2emRSHK5H_5_nFAIn-T6_4/s400/IMG_0504.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5487931223428962898" border="0" /></a><br /><br />When we were in Jamiaca for 4 months we didn't have many toys for their age. On the trip down we had to load the suitcases with school books along with clothing for the entire family. Each child had one backpack for some toys, books and crayons. While we were there, I began showing them how to make things out of cereal boxes, toilet paper rolls, and cardboard of any kind. Soon we had piles of homemade gadgets and gizmos all over the house. I finally had to say, "Ok boys, no more for a while, we have too much!" Where we live here, there is a huge woodpile and the children are allowed to use any of the wood that has been discarded. Here, Joey has made a monitor for his computer. The keyboard is just a piece of cardboard...and away he goes!!<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhFgaJ0qzX4qNBoclHWk469JY5LvMLP6Jop35GkJ26F7WYfqHVTMINyLmCLbu17HK606YCL06nk73l8nQL2yPYydHqij0SKkK5rNb1xhqRGHg45cZP3RdiyaS8KzbXxVRvNxDFReP5upw/s1600/IMG_0500.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhFgaJ0qzX4qNBoclHWk469JY5LvMLP6Jop35GkJ26F7WYfqHVTMINyLmCLbu17HK606YCL06nk73l8nQL2yPYydHqij0SKkK5rNb1xhqRGHg45cZP3RdiyaS8KzbXxVRvNxDFReP5upw/s400/IMG_0500.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5487931216079288146" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Missionary kids don't have it rough. They have a great life. Yes, they live in another culture, but they see firsthand the power of an almighty God. The power of a changed life. They also grow up making their own fun. What a life!! They chase lizards, rescue birds, watch eggs hatch in the bushes outside of our house...make forts out of palm leaves, guns out of wood pieces, they are living life! Wow! How awesome is THAT?!!<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-2ni-V23qE0OKce6lHQwuy0ekxYLSlHCOP1VN82UIKTZlVXrEmd4udx5JaLbeHsB8pk8TRcgWFEuAbFRFkuD47jsc9BZ3noKJxcWGBvdgq8re5FFStd4uyLzMDxTsJL6RdGwPYgZy_U/s1600/IMG_0499.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-2ni-V23qE0OKce6lHQwuy0ekxYLSlHCOP1VN82UIKTZlVXrEmd4udx5JaLbeHsB8pk8TRcgWFEuAbFRFkuD47jsc9BZ3noKJxcWGBvdgq8re5FFStd4uyLzMDxTsJL6RdGwPYgZy_U/s400/IMG_0499.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5487931208139985842" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Unfortunately all good things must end, and so it goes for the spaceship. The boys went inside after a rain, and when they moved the blanket back, a tarantula crawled out! It was bigger than my hand. The boys decided it would no longer be ok to play in a tarantula hide out, so they tore the fort apart. They now have relocated the fort to another place.<br /><br />Missionary kids...it doesn't get any better than this! WHAT A LIFE!Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-67319077242226147342010-06-17T16:40:00.004-04:002010-06-17T18:50:06.129-04:00Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-42962975960110268212010-06-14T11:04:00.002-04:002010-06-14T11:06:09.465-04:00Under the Palms<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jdq7F2LOYGGDhBQpxbTkA_i3v79hrYGajXiRr4rmy5wXfkz0I_Pemo918CtsfvMZlsh17A7m38zlCbGKm4OpyG_9ympUTtG_rP5B06xJC9QtiGSRkkgWJTB2-cxSqxSLjz8MeLr2Rr8/s1600/IMG_5109.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 484px; height: 338px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-jdq7F2LOYGGDhBQpxbTkA_i3v79hrYGajXiRr4rmy5wXfkz0I_Pemo918CtsfvMZlsh17A7m38zlCbGKm4OpyG_9ympUTtG_rP5B06xJC9QtiGSRkkgWJTB2-cxSqxSLjz8MeLr2Rr8/s400/IMG_5109.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482500833029236706" border="0" /></a><br /><br />I remember while in the States on deputation, traveling here and there, meeting new people every day. It seemed I made many friends, many acquaintances...but they were quick friendship. There wasn't much time to get close to someone, because so soon, it was time to go again. In Belize though, it is different.<br /><br />I have now been here for nearly seven months and already I feel my heart stretching. I'm getting to know some of the people, and my heart longs to love them more. I pray and ask God to love them through me. I ache for them to know the love of God almighty. I think of these people throughout my week, and I wonder to myself, "Do they even contain God in their thoughts? Do they realize how much God loves them and wants to know them?"<br /><br />I wanted you to meet some of our people....<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicBIsBldi230PMtgQcFn914rVJJ1-nWpdHCsf9OzChM9btnTR5dwkjTpEI8r8klUe8udYyrF5kjiRo4_Zhl1vOELeJH-r5kSZHVlE-BtZXlsbHBpOsZhrH67NqG9yZsl7KyYGqGYOv6L8/s1600/IMG_5130.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 371px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicBIsBldi230PMtgQcFn914rVJJ1-nWpdHCsf9OzChM9btnTR5dwkjTpEI8r8klUe8udYyrF5kjiRo4_Zhl1vOELeJH-r5kSZHVlE-BtZXlsbHBpOsZhrH67NqG9yZsl7KyYGqGYOv6L8/s400/IMG_5130.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482494123189854786" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="text-decoration: underline;">This is a picture of my Sunday School class. I teach 4-6 year olds. We ran out of chairs so we decided to sit on the mats on the floor. Today I taught them the story of Moses and the children of Israel complaining about manna. I passed out crackers several times and taught about the importance of being thankful for all that God gives us. What a joy it is to serve God by teaching these little ones.</span><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW8ECAZGMbjIktSn0XF3xVbJsQSS3G51LkW2mJxCN1ASOwTq6wuAocVFtCROcHXUVTrAYM2joy8yhyphenhyphenBlPL1zntxDDZu74YWNtyjfRo9BeqECL28dzs1JtsYnhJgLVi51mL5zwCPPBC53U/s1600/IMG_5144.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 369px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW8ECAZGMbjIktSn0XF3xVbJsQSS3G51LkW2mJxCN1ASOwTq6wuAocVFtCROcHXUVTrAYM2joy8yhyphenhyphenBlPL1zntxDDZu74YWNtyjfRo9BeqECL28dzs1JtsYnhJgLVi51mL5zwCPPBC53U/s400/IMG_5144.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482494102860658498" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW8ECAZGMbjIktSn0XF3xVbJsQSS3G51LkW2mJxCN1ASOwTq6wuAocVFtCROcHXUVTrAYM2joy8yhyphenhyphenBlPL1zntxDDZu74YWNtyjfRo9BeqECL28dzs1JtsYnhJgLVi51mL5zwCPPBC53U/s1600/IMG_5144.JPG">This is Anita</a>. Right now I believe her house is flooding. She lives in a small house with 7 other people (at least) and when we picked her up today, the water from the rain was just flooding through her yard. She tends to be quiet and sometimes a little mischievous, but there are those rare moments, (like in the photo) where she seems to soak up every word you are saying, and I wonder..."Lord, what is it that You had in mind when you created her?" I believe He has an awesome plan!<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR4TnBOZ2FiEt1KySL6WxOAy75SxvvjLA31vA8kXrMGYt_zVCrvNwBfeJYUYz7Y5ZNOjJ8aHUb1chfwOJ9Z0bx4nU4FH4gfOywC0TX3Wlza9ydI7v5PoHASuEgAJ_ITHQpd2HRqBtHCVE/s1600/IMG_5105.JPG">Meet Marvin</a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR4TnBOZ2FiEt1KySL6WxOAy75SxvvjLA31vA8kXrMGYt_zVCrvNwBfeJYUYz7Y5ZNOjJ8aHUb1chfwOJ9Z0bx4nU4FH4gfOywC0TX3Wlza9ydI7v5PoHASuEgAJ_ITHQpd2HRqBtHCVE/s1600/IMG_5105.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 352px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR4TnBOZ2FiEt1KySL6WxOAy75SxvvjLA31vA8kXrMGYt_zVCrvNwBfeJYUYz7Y5ZNOjJ8aHUb1chfwOJ9Z0bx4nU4FH4gfOywC0TX3Wlza9ydI7v5PoHASuEgAJ_ITHQpd2HRqBtHCVE/s400/IMG_5105.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482494111214695778" border="0" />Meet Marvin.</a> Marvin is 13 and the 4th child in a family of 12 people. His parents are still together, and they all live in a shack smaller than most of your living rooms...no kidding. They have a stove, and "borrowed" electricity. No refrigerator, no indoor plumbing. Marvin is a self-appointed visitation expert. He knows everyone in the village, and everyone knows him. He loves to go around and help invite others to church. Although he is the 4th child, and his dad's name is George, everyone calls their family's house, "Marvin's house" because he is so well known and liked. When Kevin asked Marvin several weeks back, "Why do you come to church Marvin?" He simply said, "To honor God."<br /><br /><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><br /><br /><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoDcZ56G6csYrLhkwnFShCwdfR8nOaeB8gk46ciexK8D3loI-14vaRFYzL-1vi59UDcyRe77emSK8PpgikjQ91f22Y-RcAmr9Y50HH_EezGSANMVaK1Z8Gxt6GzX7P5zPj9UfzFQyRxtM/s1600/IMG_5120.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 267px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoDcZ56G6csYrLhkwnFShCwdfR8nOaeB8gk46ciexK8D3loI-14vaRFYzL-1vi59UDcyRe77emSK8PpgikjQ91f22Y-RcAmr9Y50HH_EezGSANMVaK1Z8Gxt6GzX7P5zPj9UfzFQyRxtM/s400/IMG_5120.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482500841123072386" border="0" /></a><br /><span style="text-decoration: underline;">We are currently meeting under this thatch roofed building. We have no walls, no screens, sometimes we have electricity, sometimes not. The spirit is sweet and the people are growing. I am excited about what the Lord is doing here and the people He has sent our way. Serving God is not always easy, and there are difficult days with trials. Tonight we were swarmed with flood flies, the people were laughing and smacking flies left and right. Pastor Mike had to stop preaching and wait for Kevin to go get the bus, then we all loaded up and he finished his sermon on a bus, with all of the windows up. It was HOT! A few weeks back someone stole the electrical box that was to serve the property with electricity. We've had chairs stolen. Now for EACH SERVICE...all of the equipment has to be loaded from the Leonard's home into a trailer, taken to the church property, unloaded and set up. Chairs, pulpit, table for water, water jug, cups, song books, keyboard, bibles....anything that we need for the service. EVERY SERVICE. It is a lot of work. The Bible says, "Thou therefore endure hardness as a good soldier </span><span style="text-decoration: underline;">of Jesus Christ, no man that warreth entangleth himself with the affairs of this life, that he may please him who hath chosen him to be a soldier."<br /><br /><br /><br /></span><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUrkvUa-1sXWQ6kWycyABAl8WNO7frV8DKhpGC512ypi1_bMKLlRkYJJOJecoaMSoGm6y1xPO506x6x1893647SaqO0Fvc1zaCrBlHimpQdZZ-uOt46dwZsgV84vAdLq3h8rMX8oA-5dM/s1600/IMG_5182.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 317px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUrkvUa-1sXWQ6kWycyABAl8WNO7frV8DKhpGC512ypi1_bMKLlRkYJJOJecoaMSoGm6y1xPO506x6x1893647SaqO0Fvc1zaCrBlHimpQdZZ-uOt46dwZsgV84vAdLq3h8rMX8oA-5dM/s400/IMG_5182.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5482500859409828930" border="0" /></a>Thus the Lord is bringing me to the place where I can love more. It's not about whether or not we are in an enclosed building, or whether we are swarmed by flies...or even if we are flooded, this is all about loving people for God. We endure hardness to be allowed the honor of being a "good soldier of Jesus Christ" If we faint in the day of adversity, our strength is small. The boils, the ants, the delays, the weather, the stealing, it all pales in comparison to the privilege of being able to watch God move. Under these palms, I have found joy in serving the Lord and I have grown to love people once more.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-79747499346547008002010-05-29T23:49:00.003-04:002010-05-30T00:29:53.463-04:00Watering the bedThere are some things you do on a regular basis on the mission field that you never dreamed of doing. Last night before Elliana went to bed, I had to water her bed. Yep! I had to water her bed.<br /><br /> When we first moved down to Belize, it was the end of rainy season, and the beginning of a dry season and the bugs were plenteous. The poor little child had bug bites all over her. I would spray her down with "OFF!" right before bed, (which really is not a pleasant smell or feeling to sleep with). All the ants, mosquitos and flying things (with pinchers) just loved her fat little legs. In the morning I would check her out, put tea tree oil on all the bites, and change her bedding...AGAIN. Before nap time, I would check her bed again, put her down and after nap it was another routine of checking for bites, applying something to them...changing bedding or shaking it out...not fun, but necessary.<br /><br />One of the Belizeans told me I should put the legs of the bed in bowls of water, so no bugs can get to her bed. Hmmmm....never thought about it before, but it should work! So I found some yogurt bowls and butter bowls, lifted up the crib and set it down into the bowls. Then I added water. It was interesting to see the next day what TRIED to get into her bed, but was drowned by the water instead. <br /><br />So now, each day I check the water level, to see if more water is needed to keep the crawling bugs away. Last night I filled a pitcher and went to Ellie's room to water her bed.<br /><br />The older I get the more I realize how every situation in my life usually has some spiritual application. Our trials are to make us stronger so there must be something to learn from them. <br /><br />There is a verse in Ephesians that speaks of "washing of water by the word". The verse is referring to Christ and the church...but I think it might apply to my "watering the bed".<br /><br />Without the "Water of the Word" in our lives, so many "bugs" just creep in. We may not even see them coming, but still they are there. They take over our hearts desires, and bite and devour our usefulness for God. Before we know it, we're covered with scars due to our lack of using the "Water of the Word" to protect us. Yet, if each day we water our souls with the Word of God, and we live in His will...we can live victorious over temptation and avoid the scars of sin. We can rest peacefully knowing that although the "bugs" are there, they cannot reach us.<br /><br />Each day as I check the water in those little butter bowls...I also need to ask myself if there are things creeping into my life, that need to be washed away. How much water have I added to my soul?Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-73614999847157966922010-05-17T00:58:00.002-04:002010-05-17T01:29:58.153-04:00ChosenI was reading in John 15 this week and the verse that says, "You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you." seemed to jump out at me. I have thought on this verse many times this week. When I was a new Christian, I used to think that I chose Christ. I chose the path I would follow. I chose whether I would stay with my old friends or find new Christian friends. I used to think it was all my doing. Sure, Christ saved me...but I chose Him, and I chose the path I would follow. Here I am 17 years later, and my thinking has really changed.<br /><br />It was God who chose me. <br /><br />I began to think "Well, I wonder when He chose me?" Was it when I was a girl, and scared and alone? Did God see a girl riding a bus to Sunday School and decide then, "I choose HER"? Did He choose me when I would pray to Him; not even knowing who He was, but believing He was there?<br /><br />No. He chose me before the foundation of the world. He wanted me all along. What a difference this makes in all of my thinking!<br /><br />He orchestrated my life to give me an opportunity somehow, someway...to meet Him. He led my life down through valleys and up on the mountains, so I would see Him. He is in love with me, and will never leave me nor forsake me. What an awesome God!<br /><br />I am amazed at how good He was to lead us here to Belize. To a needy people. A people uneducated on the ways of God. I have met Christians, who also have beliefs in the ways of witchcraft! Such confusion boggles the mind. <br /><br />I am amazed that He led us here to work with the Leonard Family. It is so nice to be able to have friends to labor with. It is such a blessing to be able to invite friends over for pizza, or to go shopping together. The Lord sent the disciples out two by two, yet so many times missionaries go out alone. I am so thankful God led us to come here, to labor with someone. It seems when frustrating times come, that just being able to carry the load together, makes it so much lighter.<br /><br />If God chose me, long ago...and He has led my life thus far, why would He stop now? I have often told my husband that after nearly 13 years of marriage, knowing what I know now...if I had to do it all over again, I would still choose him. I think that's how God feels about me. He has not given up on me, nor will He ever. He chose me. If he had to do it all over, knowing now what he knows...He would still choose me.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-67135859854251054932010-04-23T13:27:00.003-04:002010-04-23T14:09:13.831-04:00Just a bag of chipsThis week, as always, I was faced with a load of guilt. The guilt weighed down my spirit and left me confused with no answers to the problem that plagued my soul. Each week...I face this guilt. So unlike any guilt I've ever known...it is unrelenting in it's accusations. This guilt takes fragments of truth, and shouts them at me over and over and over again. I recognize the voice of guilt as that of the devil, seeking to discourage me and keep me from walking close to my Lord. Yet, never has the confusion been so great as what the devil is using now.<br /><br />I was grocery shopping for our family. There are eight of us now, two still in diapers. Our grocery budget is the same each week, and I keep within the limits. I buy all household items with this money. I had my small cart loaded to nearly overflowing...my list was nearly all scratched out. Cleaning supplies, treats for Sunday School kids, diapers, shampoo, produce...it was all there. I began unloading my cart and looked up behind me to see three ladies standing there counting change. They had a couple of bags of flour, salt, cornmeal...just a few items. I turned back to the task at hand, unloading my cart. I couldn't help but notice their stares as I put ALL my stuff on the counter. And then came the guilt. Why? I had 4 bags of chips...2 bags were for our lunches this week...2 bags were tortilla chips for a dinner of nachos. I thought of the cost of just the chips. I could buy what the ladies were carrying 4 times over...if I didn't buy the chips. Did we really need chips? Then came the voice of guilt, "HA...sure you're a Christian...follower of Christ...with all of your expensive food, while these ladies are counting shillings to buy flour! Who do you think YOU ARE AMY? Serving God on the mission field...if you really cared about these people..." And on and on the voice spoke. I continued unloading my cart, but every time I glanced back I saw the faces of the ladies, staring at my groceries.<br /><br />The verse crossed my mind..."And all that believed were together, and had all things common; and sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need. And they continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart, praising God, and having favour with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved."<br /><br />We are need fillers, that is why we are here. People need the Lord, yet sometimes they need food as well. Obviously we cannot feed every hungry belly...so difficult choices must sometimes be made. Do you help only those who come to church...because you cannot help everyone? What about the children whose parents do not come to church...yet they are hungry too? How do you know who to help, and who to not help? The only answer is to listen to the Holy Spirit, and follow His promptings. God is capable of saying to me, "Amy...help them" and He does.<br /><br />All of these thoughts flooded through my mind while I was checking out. Then I heard the Lord..."Just buy their groceries Amy..." I looked at the cashier and said, "Go ahead and ring theirs up too...I'll pay for them." I couldn't talk to the ladies as they only spoke spanish. I don't think they even knew what was happening, because as the lady checked them out, they began counting their change again. I paid the cashier and quickly walked out.<br /><br />I never thought I would feel guilt over buying food for my family, yet I do. Why was I born in America? I didn't choose where I would be born any more than these people here did...so why are they hungry, while I buy chips without a second thought. The ladies food cost me less than $8 (US)...while my chips cost around $20. Once again I am humbled. I think from now on I will always see the ladies faces each time I buy a bag of chips.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-45127087190404469762010-03-28T01:27:00.002-04:002010-03-28T02:07:36.041-04:00Quarantined!For those who have not heard the latest hurdle we are facing, it is boils. A few weeks back Ellie had one, and so did two members of the Leonard family. We went to the lab and had them analyzed and it was determined to be MRSA staph boils. Poor Michelle has been fighting them forever, I think she has had seven. Ellie has had three now, and Kevin and I have had one. They are quite painful, sometimes bringing nausea along with all of the swelling and pressure. Kevin has one the size of a lemon.<br /><br />Michelle found a pharmacy here that has the right kind of antibiotic to fight MRSA, so we are all on it right now. She has taught me the ways of vigorous hand washing with special hand cleaner. We have to rid ourselves of this, it will not just go away on its own.<br /><br />Pastor Mike told us today that our familly is officially quarantined! He made an executive decision for our own good. Today we got our antibiotics to begin. They last for six days. <br /><br />I woke this morning with great plans of disinfecting every inch of our house. I contemplated making the kids soak in bleach water, (just kidding). However, early this morning I woke to my backdoor and entire living room floor covered in ants. On Tuesday I found a whole nest of them in my laundry. 126 made it through the washing machine. I know, because I counted them as I pulled them off the clothes I was hanging on the line. Here we go again, sigh. Our spray ran out a couple of days ago, so I had no ant killer. I have been killing ants all day, literally. Since we were out of spray I decided I would just vacuum them. They were coming in faster than I could get them up. It was crazy.<br /><br />Now remember, everything in Belize bites. Letting them just come on in and getting comfortable was not an option. I poured salt across the stoop where they were coming in, (someone told me that might work), they crawled right over top of the salt. Then Ellie spilled something as I was vacuuming ants out of the kitchen (where they had decided to visit)...now I had ants, salt, and salt water to clean up. It wasn't even 8am. I knew then this was going to be a long day.<br /><br />I finally decided to try hot sauce. So I poured hot sauce on the stoop...they didn't cross it. They did however come through the door frame, where the wood had separated from the concrete. Great. So I found the caulking gun. Couldn't be too hard to use right? Well, I figured it out, and I have globs of white stuff all around my door to prove my efforts. I'm hoping it will really "dry clear" like it says on the outside of the tube. I know this is hard to imagine, but I was vacuuming non-stop and it wasn't enough. I would stop long enough to take out the bagless container and have the boys run and empty it way in the back by the trash cans.<br /><br />We went to town at one point to get the medicine for the boils, when we got home, the ants were all over again. Now though, I had to make dinner. Sigh. I never did get anything disinfected. No germ free house. No clean door knobs and MRSA free light switches. There were germs still lurking all around me, and ants as well!!<br /><br />Michelle had told me earlier in the day of a visit her and Pastor Mike had made in a village. The woman had to walk 3 miles to get to the bus station to ride to work. She had no running water, no electric, but she was happy. Michelle told me her home was so peaceful. This lady cooked over a fire, and invited Michelle to come up so she could show her how to cook over a fire too. Michelle told me seeing her really put things into perspective for her. <br /><br />I realized, she probably deals with ants too. I wonder what she does? I'm sure she sprays them, so did we and they just come back. I'm sure she doesn't have a vacuum with no electricity. So does she sweep them all the time? I was not joyful today killing ants all day long. I was annoyed that I couldn't get them to stay out. How come this woman had more joy than I did? We are probably in the same situation with the little invaders, and I have more power to rid my home of the nuisance than she does...yet my attitude was short, I was annoyed and frustrated, greatly lacking in any type of joy whatsoever. Perhaps God sent me the ants to show me how rotten my attitude really was, and how thankful I should be.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-91122483074264791732010-03-19T02:11:00.000-04:002010-03-19T02:11:58.019-04:00Send the RainYesterday as I began my routine, we received word of an amazing answer to prayer. Some business group in California contacted my husband and told him they would be depositing money into our work account for a personal vehicle and a church vehicle. Up until this point we have been maxed out each Sunday with seating in the vehicles, sometimes making 3 trips to get everyone to the church. Everyone here uses public transportation, very few have vehicles. It seems each week there has been some issue with the bus as well. We all keep going forward, even if it means bringing 80 people to church by shuttling them all in a 12 passenger van. This was just huge to all of us here...WOW!! The most incredible thing to me was...we have no idea who these business people are.<br /><br />Have you ever noticed when God does something "huge"...little nuisances that would normally steal our joy, or quickly frustrate us...well, they just don't have much power anymore. All day long I thought of how awesome my God is. I was very much in awe of His working in our lives, of His provision, and also His ways. They really are much much higher than our ways. Well, let me tell you about my day on Wednesday when we received the news.<br /><br />About 9am our power went off. Now this does not happen often, but when it does you never know how long it will be off, and you are rarely prepared. I was about to start a load of wash, do the dishes, and start a cartoon for the kids. None of which happened. Then I got the call from Kevin saying, "You are not going to believe this e-mail I just opened!"<br /><br />From that point on...<br />It didn't matter to me that I couldn't wash the clothes as I had planned because....<br />God was so real to me, there was no room to be frustrated.<br />I was not frustrated that things were not going according to my plan because....<br />God was so real to me, there was no room for frustration.<br /><br />Then a couple of hours later, the water was shut off. It was only supposed to be for a couple of hours to repair a pipe, but ended up taking all day. So in order to wash the dishes and clean the kitchen I had to go to the rain barrel and fill up a bucket and haul it into the house. I then heated it up on the stove, poured it into the sink, then went to get some more water for rinsing.<br />Again...<br />God was so real to me, there was no room for frustration. I was so amazed that God had led a complete stranger to send us money for vehicles, I knew that He was in control! The God of the universe...HE WAS IN CONTROL!<br /><br />Wasn't He always though? Really.<br /><br />I thought of our rain barrel. God sent the rain long ago, and it has been there all along. Each day I see it, I pass it...I know it's there and I know it has water in it and yet I don't use it. I don't depend on it. After all, I have other sources for water...the rain barrel is only there if all other water sources fail.<br /><br />God is always in control. Always. Period. No question. We know that. We hear it. We tell others...yet do we believe it ourselves? Do we trust that He is in control, do we depend on the unfailing truth, that God is in control? Or do we trust our other "sources" until they all fail...then we walk with head hung low to our rain barrel, just wondering and hoping that the rain is in the barrel. Do we go through life defeated and wondering if God is real. Is God really interested in our lives? Is He really there for us?<br /><br />Yes He is. He's been there all along, He never left. Just like that rain barrel though, He's there, we just never stop to take the time to use Him, to trust Him, to believe that He is God.<br /><br />I was thanking God yesterday that He sent the rain several weeks ago, knowing all along that the water He had sent would be used to wash my dishes when the pipes were being repaired. He sent the rain long ago. My friend, God is there for you. He knew long ago that you would need a Saviour, a Friend, a Provider, a Lover of your soul. He sent Jesus for you before you even knew you had a need. And there He is just waiting for you to finally need Him, to call upon Him, to trust Him.<br /><br />Our God is so real, so mighty, so awesome...oh may we love and trust Him more.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-59104687772632227012010-03-16T02:16:00.003-04:002010-03-16T02:59:04.653-04:00Reality...I've wondered many times in the past several weeks, "If I COULD get online and blog...WHAT would I write and share?" <br /><br />I've always thought of myself as a realist. I've never thought of myself as a pessimist, yet when I think of things to share, it tends to be what most would think of as negative. I always want to share what life is really like. What I am really thinking and struggling with. Areas that I desperately need to grow in. I want to share my weaknesses, my tainted thinking...my sin. Why? I'm not sure. <br /><br />Perhaps because I tire of reading things written in our age so full of fluff and flowery words, yet lacking in the realities of everyday grit and grime of life that we all live in. Do we not all need to know that we all struggle with ourselves? None of us have arrived or become "Mrs Beaver"...she doesn't exist.<br /><br />I love it here in Belize. I am amazed everyday that we are here, and that God has placed us in this area of service. I love birds and nature...and I see beautiful plant life all around me, I discover new birds everyday. How wonderful that God, knowing what I enjoy, placed me here.<br /><br />And yet...I struggle.<br /><br />I struggle with not being annoyed...with my children being infested with lice twice in 3 weeks. It is a lot of work to do all of that wash and wash all of their heads, then pull out the nits and the eggs in a 24 hour period. Only to hear a mother explain to me that she knows when children have lice because when it gets hot..."the lice just fall out of their heads and you see them on their shoulders." (that is dandruff...lice do not just "fall out") Can I still love and hold these children unconditionally....knowing all the work that is ahead if we get lice another time? I am poorly lacking in my Christlikeness.<br /><br />I love my house, I love where we live. It is a peaceful place with a large yard, beautiful scenery and it is quiet. <br /><br />And yet I struggle.<br /><br />I struggle with wanting my peaceful home to myself. When the neighbor kids come screaming and playing in our backyard, do I smile to myself that these children love playing with my children in our yard, or do I get frustrated that my peace has been interrupted? When they walk into my house to say hello, and play with our children's toys...am I accepting and loving or upset because they didn't even knock...they just walked right in?<br /><br />Our church is growing...God is blessing this ministry each and every week. Many adults are coming, and the children love church too. Even though we have services in a tractor barn, completely opened and exposed to bugs, ants, flies, mosquito's etc...the people don't seem to even mind, so why should I? The spirit is great, the people are excited and so am I. The bugs really don't bother me much anymore...and yet I struggle.<br /><br />Each week there is a new dilema. Sometimes the bus won't run. The brakes go out. The van window was shattered. Stealing was last week, when someone went to the barn and stole some chairs. Before it was a water container...there has also been diesel stolen from the bus. And yet God is blessing, so it is He that gives us joy to continue.<br /><br />We've dealt with ant nests in our house. Scorpions and tarantulas. Lice. Ellie now has a staph boil. They are very contagious, and there isn't much in the way of medicine down here to treat them. Again, I am amazed at the goodness of my God to lead me here to be with another family, who just happens to have some medicine for staph boils. I really see that as God providing and loving us.<br /><br />To me, I am excited to see God working each day. The way that God chooses to work each day in my life is up to Him. I am excited to just see that He IS working. If He chooses to show Himself to me by providing medicine for a boil, that I never even knew would come, well Praise the Lord...His hand is here. He may choose to show Himself by allowing a teenager to come to church...when her Dad said she couldn't for 3 months. It is an amazing thing to know that God is with you "right now" (Belizean saying).<br /><br />And my struggles? They are real, and I am faced each day with disciplining my mind to think right. To love others. To be Christlike, and to please HIM with my life. Isn't that what we all struggle with?Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-9740589880129910082010-01-11T20:51:00.002-05:002010-01-11T21:18:39.107-05:00Home sweet homeWhere to start???<br /><br />We are in our home and settled finally. Our container did arrive on the 17th of December...just a couple of weeks later than we expected. Christmas seemed a little rushed, but we did have all of our decorations up and most of our things unpacked. It is nice to feel like we are home.<br /><br />So many details rush to my mind that I want to share...petty unimportant things, as well as wonderful blessings! I will start with the petty.<br /><br />Ant nests, I found 4 of them in my house, 2 of which were in my clothes drawers. One was in my kitchen cabinet. I opened the cabinet and they were EVERYWHERE! I was disgusted, and weak-kneed! I called Kevin to tell him, I saw dozens crawling out of the spout of a ceramic teapot, so I put the aerosol can of ant killer into the spout and sprayed away. I told him I couldn't stand the sight of all of those ants, so I would not be cleaning the teapot out, I would leave that for him! When I got of the phone I thought to myself, "Some missionary wife YOU ARE! Calling your husband crying over an ant nest!" (by the way they were bigger than carpenter ants, and had pinchers!) I just couldn't bring myself to even take the teapot out of the cabinet! So after a good scolding to myself, I brought the pot out of the cabinet, peeked inside, and almost threw up! They were ants in every stage of development in there, even the larvae! PUKE! After seeing them, I just accepted that I would not be cleaning out that teapot, and it was waiting for Kevin when he came home!<br /><br />The ladies at church told me that even though the ants are scary, and they do bite, they are a blessing when they come to your house, because they march right through in scores, and hundreds, killing any insect in its path. Then they move on. They even eat scorpions.<br /><br />Oh, I had one of those in my house to. A big black one called an Emperor Scorpion...about 3 inches long. Yep, that was quite a scream too!<br /><br />Then you have to remember that I have boys. Lots of jungle trees to climb. FUN FUN FUN!! Right? Well, you forgot that little boys do not have developed brains until they are 25!!<br /><br />Derek tells me he was climbing this tree, and he saw a tail sticking out of a hole! It was a mean looking lizard, but because the lizard wasn't moving, the boys decided he must be dead and started PULLING ON HIS TAIL!! Fortunately for them, the lizard did not attack them, just stayed in his nice hole. Crazy boys!<br /><br />The water here is also nasty, you cannot drink it or brush your teeth with it. There are many parasites and germs that can make you very sick. Ellie was taking a bath the other night, and I went to check on her, she had taken the head off of a doll and was drinking water out of the head! So we have be trying to help her through a lot of dirty diapers and a small fever.<br /><br />Because of the water...when I get home from market, I immediately put all of my produce into a sink filled with bleach water, and let them soak for a few minutes and air dry before putting them away. <br /><br />I have learned to make homemade tortillas and homemade salsa. Yummy.<br /><br />It has been wonderful to be a part of the church here. We are meeting in a tractor barn, and the people just keep coming! When it is hot, there are mosquitos and gnats that bite. One man even stepped in a bunch of ants during church, and was in the back lifting his pants legs, smacking and hitting them. We have a dirt floor too, that the kids love to run around and kick the dirt up in the air. Matt Leonard found a 6 ft snake right near the church a few weeks back...it was poisonous too.<br /><br />Each day I wake up to the thought of how wonderful it is to be here...how good of God to lead us to this place of service. I look forward to seeing all that He has planned for us and the Leonard's.<br /><br />Thank you all for praying for us as we made this move, please continue to pray!Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-40697713650974145592009-11-15T00:55:00.002-05:002009-11-15T01:09:19.851-05:00Time to goIn less than 3 days all of us will be flying out of America and heading toward Belize, Central America. We are all excited and greatly anticipating our move to do Missionary work. We are thrilled, overjoyed and ready.<br /><br />Right now is the hard part. Packing what we have lived with and been using this year. Packing clothing we have been wearing, and are currently wearing too. Packing and sorting everything we own once more and asking ourselves "will we use this on the mission field?" Weaning ourselves of things we really don't need...packing everything else. Listing on many sheets of paper all that we own (we are so blessed are we not?)...preparing to go.<br /><br />Then there is the normal everyday duties...cleaning, cooking, baths, cleaning again, cooking, wiping a snotty nose...etc..<br /><br />I was feeling like I was treading water with my nose right above the water when Hannah came home. You know, barely getting things done, prioritizing and then re-prioritizing, because there wasn't enough time in the day to do it all. Adjusting to a newborn with 5 other children in the house is hard enough, and now we are moving too! We have had our days fairly planned out so this last week hasn't been so hectic. Now though we are down to the last couple of days, and what else needs to be done you ask?<br /><br />Well....<br />about 3 loads of laundry, then it all needs to be packed or put away in the missionary apartment. Then there is the toys that keep getting scattered, that needs put away again. Oh and I want to wash my quilt before it gets loaded up for the move. A load of things needs to be taken down to the storage unit...rugs, lamps, piano, recliner. Then there is one last trip to the grocery store to stock up on baking items for the holidays. A trip to target for a necessity. Kevin wants to go to JC Penny's to get some things for himself. A stop at GFS to pick up some spices for another missionary. Then we have church of course, tomorrow. Monday the truck comes to pick up our things. I think I'm all ready...I think?<br /><br />It will probably be several weeks before our internet is hooked up and running again, but I will be keeping a written journal of our happenings.<br /><br />Please say a prayer for us as we travel with the children, that we will all stay healthy too. Also, please pray for our container to arrive safely in Belize.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-19549910130435494492009-11-06T23:34:00.003-05:002009-11-06T23:42:42.207-05:00My sweet Hannah<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOdJ6V9s3vkBcCtBmASlzhybpnXftVyaR3SPl-LHW6E9BQ_1fxK92BMQ8J4sV6mytY1Bf9zKd3pCX5hDu92O6qy7AYu-ygJ_rGVXpVoLknLYWHZokEKmBPszp6K4vWtzuVp-SQYcwhCsM/s1600-h/Hannah+Grace+Nov+09.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOdJ6V9s3vkBcCtBmASlzhybpnXftVyaR3SPl-LHW6E9BQ_1fxK92BMQ8J4sV6mytY1Bf9zKd3pCX5hDu92O6qy7AYu-ygJ_rGVXpVoLknLYWHZokEKmBPszp6K4vWtzuVp-SQYcwhCsM/s400/Hannah+Grace+Nov+09.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5401215737865961906" /></a><br />It's funny how after having children for 10 years, things change. I never have slept with any of my children. I have snuggled them while nursing, and dozed while holding them in my arms...but never have slept with them next to me. At first it was a "new parent" thing. I had heard an opinion, and thought, "WOW, THAT IS SO PROFOUND!" and went whichever way I was swayed...in this instance, no sleeping with babies. Now that I've been a parent for a few years, I realize...I will not be able to snuggle and doze with them for very long. This infant stage is indeed a very short stage...and I intend to enjoy every moment I can. Hannah has slept with me most nights this week, she is fighting a cough. I place her on her back on a pillow, then I curl up around her and put my arm under the pillow. It is amazing how sweet sleep is with her so close to me. I never knew what I was missing out on all those years and all of those babies. I always said I couldn't sleep soundly while they were in the bed, but if they are in a reclined position, where they are not moving about, it really is nice.<br /><br />And this is her, my sweet Hannah Grace. It is so nice having a new little one. Isn't she precious?!!?Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-30411030446614484292009-11-03T00:20:00.002-05:002009-11-03T00:45:58.594-05:00Within my heart...my Sister<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2nglz8_s1RN_k5j6Q5-93S65mXcy4Xp0IlOPA6AYpHvidfquUWaKhlaCfXjzwXDjMH9cyNbbtMTjhtXeRXAx_gs1ArG3IdtqESEes_LzsLt3d-g_DTQbdb-3-uYXlt6iLHmizWjbsHEI/s1600-h/Carrie+and+Eric.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 309px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2nglz8_s1RN_k5j6Q5-93S65mXcy4Xp0IlOPA6AYpHvidfquUWaKhlaCfXjzwXDjMH9cyNbbtMTjhtXeRXAx_gs1ArG3IdtqESEes_LzsLt3d-g_DTQbdb-3-uYXlt6iLHmizWjbsHEI/s400/Carrie+and+Eric.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5399743449892973090" /></a><br />My beautiful sister, Carrie Lynn and her husband Eric.<br /><br />She came into my life right after I turned one. For the next 15 years we would laugh, play, cry, love, and fight with one another. We have shared many tears and sorrows, my sister and I...yet, I love her as much as anyone could love someone.<br /><br />Her husband has been fighting Ewing's sarcoma for some time now. He is 34 I think. Eric has had part of his leg amputated, and yet the cancer is still in his body. They have fought hard, tried all the chemo available, went through a trial program, and now are using a different method to try to slow the growth of the cancer. <br /><br />I have watched my sister through all of this. Her tiny, barely 100 pound frame...doing whatever she could for this man that she loves. They have traveled back and forth hundreds of miles for treatments, and she has been there for him. I have heard the fear and worry in her voice...that only a sister can hear...when she says, "We're gonna fight this...the doctor's aren't always right!" I have heard her tears over a phone line...and tried so desperately to encourage and to love her. She is stronger than I ever knew. I have heard her talk of the Lord and answered prayer. I have listened to her excitement over bills that have been paid...when they were waiting for disability checks to start arriving. <br /><br />Twenty years ago, when we were just teenagers...I realized how very much I loved her. I agonized over her, and wept over her way back then. She was having some trouble, I wanted so much to help her...here I am 20 years later, still wanting the same thing.<br /><br />Now she is in the midst of a battle. An every day fight, against the unseen enemy of cancer. I feel so helpless, so unable to help her. I want to run to her and scoop her up and fix everything scary and painful in her life, and yet she faces her day like a soldier. <br /><br />Although I try to think of things to say that will encourage her or help in some small way, it never seems to be enough. <br /><br />Please pray for them...and for strength to face each day ahead. There is nothing more I can do, than to pray.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-67274250117318200752009-10-29T00:18:00.002-04:002009-10-29T00:41:16.815-04:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRHQHZn4COgU9sjG2X7Ak8j57aJuVQrEy7yBP1wlccx_chfxRDsgvuTQfW7jZU3jv5QDdhskbhphQvhYxdPS2_MYQjuyD-JdaIPMdWRsJ3byFGnpRPlOm969qci4PPNDd7qaknaJ4RoVQ/s1600-h/IMG_3603.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 383px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRHQHZn4COgU9sjG2X7Ak8j57aJuVQrEy7yBP1wlccx_chfxRDsgvuTQfW7jZU3jv5QDdhskbhphQvhYxdPS2_MYQjuyD-JdaIPMdWRsJ3byFGnpRPlOm969qci4PPNDd7qaknaJ4RoVQ/s400/IMG_3603.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397872967302131426" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimNxB7v0ualGQAXejOuSfI-KqyTQytU36F_rdEwo6AEgvLZOo5mwI4MYQQ3ak3Xn7O5tC2ph4FeMI6T65WCUSbzV0vmMbye0FJFWwocdczK2qrYF3Gbfm7LHAodk4-r8od9EG7Z1JjQV8/s1600-h/IMG_3545.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 368px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimNxB7v0ualGQAXejOuSfI-KqyTQytU36F_rdEwo6AEgvLZOo5mwI4MYQQ3ak3Xn7O5tC2ph4FeMI6T65WCUSbzV0vmMbye0FJFWwocdczK2qrYF3Gbfm7LHAodk4-r8od9EG7Z1JjQV8/s400/IMG_3545.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397872964823213778" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7tNaNx6GASXy5KxeyQ0JCAtRb2ekhBG8Im2_a50OqK0qZo7iyKjTUlBNLY8-A94-qNGrwUiH_AvjEsWUFCeS0XqsVegfyIctGCaf9Ff9bNMPbw86amjNLJdF1P6E157bRJcWeYNNoGBM/s1600-h/IMG_3621.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 198px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7tNaNx6GASXy5KxeyQ0JCAtRb2ekhBG8Im2_a50OqK0qZo7iyKjTUlBNLY8-A94-qNGrwUiH_AvjEsWUFCeS0XqsVegfyIctGCaf9Ff9bNMPbw86amjNLJdF1P6E157bRJcWeYNNoGBM/s400/IMG_3621.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397872956832849554" /></a><br />I feel as if I am slowly awakening out of a deep,foggy sleep. You know, the kind of sleep that slowly fades away, and you lay in bed with your eyes closed...wondering if it is really time to get up? Yes, welcome to my world.<br /><br />A wonderful world it is, filled with 6 little ones, one of which is a newborn. (Thus the foggy sleep). I wouldn't trade little Hannah for anything, but my, I've forgotten how precious sleep is to a nursing mommy. There are mornings when I get up after feeding her...AGAIN...and I think, "Wait a second...I haven't slept yet?? It's morning???" I feel like I am sleep-walking through my day. My brain cannot hold a thought for more than a few seconds, and it seems like I'm always forgetting what I was going to do...make sense?<br /><br />The pictures are from a recent trip to an apple orchard. Ellie loved the bunnies they had out for the children to pet. That is David above her on my left. Little Hannah is underneath the quilt! (I made it by the way...isn't it CUTE!!!??) As soon as I can remember to get batteries for the camera, I will post some more pictures of Hannah. <br /><br />We are also preparing to leave soon for Belize. On November 17th our flight leaves. The day before...our container will be loaded and sent off. We are in the midst of going through our things now, labeling them and packing them in boxes for the container. Kevin has lots to do as well, finalizing travel arrangements, selling our van and trailer, phone calls, and other things I am not even aware of. He keeps telling me, "You just take care of the baby and yourself..." but he is also such a blessing to me helping out when he can with the other kids. God was good to give me such a loving and caring man.<br /><br />It seems like I went to have the baby, and the leaves were barely beginning to change. I blinked my eyes, and now they are almost GONE! It has been a busy fall for me!<br /><br />I've enjoyed doing a lot of baking lately. This morning we all enjoyed some pumpkin pancakes and sausage. Yesterday I made 2 huge loaves of Banana bread. The day before I made some homemade wheat bread. If anyone has a great bread recipe, please share it with me! I love working with yeast breads, and this is a great time to try them out on the family!<br /><br />I'm sure these next few weeks will fly by as well, and we will be leaving. If you think of us, say a prayer that all will go well with our final plans. Thanks!Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-83859495421141370882009-10-14T16:15:00.001-04:002009-10-14T16:17:49.399-04:00A thousand words...and then some...: Assignment #10 - Discovery<a href="http://athousandwordsandthensome.blogspot.com/2009/10/assignment-10-discovery.html#links">A thousand words...and then some...: Assignment #10 - Discovery</a><h3 class="post-title entry-title"> <a href="http://smilingamy143.blogspot.com/2009/10/thoughts-on-discovery.html">Thoughts on Discovery</a> </h3> This latest writing assignment from:http://athousandwordsandthensome.blogspot.com/<br />has been on the word "Discovery".<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMWzSSfnLTq4i3zA7wtNBGknuaJHGBbYyrm_8F7zM7hZUJSskhpXjeCy4nH1ythq16NV-hyTb92SwbrecN7M9SbChDHZiCruzah4jbYXmrJLdUHrYvqg69ZETc8RrUZSlAlhAaYWodI0E/s1600-h/amy2.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 267px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMWzSSfnLTq4i3zA7wtNBGknuaJHGBbYyrm_8F7zM7hZUJSskhpXjeCy4nH1ythq16NV-hyTb92SwbrecN7M9SbChDHZiCruzah4jbYXmrJLdUHrYvqg69ZETc8RrUZSlAlhAaYWodI0E/s400/amy2.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5392549564638232770" border="0" /></a><br />I have thought this over in several different ways. The discoveries of children through life. The enjoyment that comes simply watching a child discover something for the first time. I read Kayte's blog and pondered the discovery of God's love for me, how it all came about in my life. I've thought about it while driving to the grocery store... and wondered at the vastness of the word discovery. Today, I came to the conclusion to write about the discovery of myself and who I am.<br /><br />As a child, I was always looking for acceptance. The things I did or did not do, was determined by what the adults in my life would think of me. As a teenager, some of the same thinking played into my actions. In college, my thoughts turned more toward how I could please God with my life. I wanted to be all I could for the Lord. In my twenties, as a young adult, I lived in a bubble, trying desperately to be that "person" of perfection who had it all together, (whatever "it" was) striving to be who I thought I was supposed to be. As a young married woman...I aimed to be exactly the kind of wife I thought my husband needed. With motherhood, my goals did not change, they were just redirected at someone else, my children. I wanted to be EVERYTHING I thought they needed.<br /><br />While these goals are all noble and good, while striving to be everything I thought everyone else needed, I lost touch with WHO I really was!<br /><br />I have discovered in the past 10 years of parenting, the past 12 years of marriage many things...about me.<br /><br />I have discovered:<br /><br />I am not perfect. Nor is anyone else on this earth. I cannot be perfect, God made me with strengths and weaknesses. Although I will be working on those weaknesses for the rest of my life and some will become strengths...I will then discover other weaknesses...and thus life will go.<br /><br />I have discovered:<br /><br />God created me for my husband. Though many times in my mind I have envisioned the type of woman that would be best for my husband...and tried desperately to become that woman...the truth is my weaknesses, and his strengths seem to fit like a puzzle, we compliment one another. We are a team. If I try to "be" like the woman in my mind...I lose touch with who I am, and forget all that I do have to offer to my marriage.<br /><br />I have discovered:<br /><br />God has blessed me with children, because He believes I am the best mother for them. Again, though I do have weaknesses that are constantly being worked on...God gave me these children. He believes in me. Even though I may sometimes feel inadequate for the job, or it seems like I am a failure in some way or another, I have discovered I have what it takes to rear these children, or God would not have given them to me.<br /><br />I have discovered:<br /><br />Who I am is ok with God. I do not have to strive to be someone else, whether a real person or made up in my mind. Do not misunderstand me, I do think we should always try to be better in our lives in different areas. I also believe that who I am, my strenths, my weaknesses, my quirks, my irritations, the things that I love and dream about...they all make me who I am...and that is what God loves about me. If I live my life pretending to be something I am not, I miss out on feeling the love of God for who I am. I have discovered...me.<a href="http://athousandwordsandthensome.blogspot.com/2009/10/assignment-10-discovery.html#links"></a>Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-10947743343336575762009-10-04T21:53:00.002-04:002009-10-04T22:10:52.694-04:00Home again<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnSDlqorT-k7zAIBRj0KcpeNK30nm999BI7-G4qbzeh9gnCoBrixag4REQsoScdEEidff2cQuY9i2LibvFf-dHA2A4DU5NdePCnoTGzctHrUATYe1eMaAhwh7C7h-bn6Wo1a_XkShvH3A/s1600-h/100_1610.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnSDlqorT-k7zAIBRj0KcpeNK30nm999BI7-G4qbzeh9gnCoBrixag4REQsoScdEEidff2cQuY9i2LibvFf-dHA2A4DU5NdePCnoTGzctHrUATYe1eMaAhwh7C7h-bn6Wo1a_XkShvH3A/s400/100_1610.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5388932510127630978" border="0" /></a><br />So now we are both home for good!! How nice it is to have us all together again. Now it is time to get back into the swing of life...homeschooling, chores, routine...etc. etc. We also have a huge move ahead in the future as we move to Belize, Central America and begin working down there. Life comes fast...so fast.<br /><br />I have found with Hannah's arrival, I am thinking more and more of when the other children were first here. I am saddened with wonder, at just how quickly time has gone by. Derek is now 10, and it seems only days ago, we brought him home as new parents. I'm sure the extra motherly hormones are contributing to this, but I just want to love them....so much. I want them to KNOW...how very precious they are to me.<br /><br />There have been times, when tired and weak, I have just looked at one of my children and cried, because I was too tired to correct them, but I knew I must. "Please, just do right, and we won't have to go through this again..." I'm sure that has been the heart's cry of many women through the ages. In all of my training and discipline, I hope, I pray...that they will always know they are loved, and wanted VERY MUCH! With this new baby, the desire to be more loving, more caring, more understanding, more patient, more kind...to those I love, has swelled within my heart to a point of consumption...<br /><br />May it consume me every day, to be better.<br /><br />I've had many older moms tell me...to enjoy these days, they go by far too quickly. But...I want to do more than just enjoy them. I want to be right, to do right...to have memories of loving my family...enjoying THEM. I want to remember laughter in our home. I want to remember love in our home. I want to live today...like I may not have a tomorrow. I want to love today, like there will never be another time to love.<br /><br />"Lord, help these dear little ones that you have blessed me with...to be loved by a Godly mother, who seeks YOUR heart, YOUR mind, YOUR love for them. Forgive me for being impatient at times. Give me a greater capacity to love...make me more like YOU, for their sake."Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-22080927999834155542009-09-24T01:02:00.002-04:002009-09-24T01:21:33.208-04:00The NICU<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW63YAbbbKUvJMViCw8vtpeiON5jvOZk0RsTydc-Q4-pfivMIHbBd1RAl3geXpondXInFXfDHtLbiqK6uISSk1Jq4vqL0ZsNmNvBHHFjmbyKh5QiXbo9hjIRriFT1WnKb317cUp8zW40o/s1600-h/lil+hannah.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW63YAbbbKUvJMViCw8vtpeiON5jvOZk0RsTydc-Q4-pfivMIHbBd1RAl3geXpondXInFXfDHtLbiqK6uISSk1Jq4vqL0ZsNmNvBHHFjmbyKh5QiXbo9hjIRriFT1WnKb317cUp8zW40o/s400/lil+hannah.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5384895111068585138" border="0" /></a>The Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. This is now my third trip to this amazingly, wonderful, place...filled with worry, nightmares, and sick little ones. May I say, THIS place...is a good place.<br /><br />When the doctor was prepping me for surgery, I was quoting over and over in my mind our family verse..."The Lord IS GOOD, a stronghold in the day of trouble and He knoweth them that trust in Him." Nahum 1:7 Over and over...this verse calmed my nerves, settled my worried mind, and brought much comfort that God IS good. I had some fears that our little one would have epilepsy as Ellie did. I was worried about watching in fear, as my little girl would stop breathing. I had bad dreams of memories I didn't want to remember. God's word, soothed my soul.<br /><br />When I returned from the recovery room and Kevin walked into the room, I could tell by his face something was not right. I asked him if he could get me the baby. It was then he told me, she had to go to the NICU. He explained everything to me...and I began to cry. My verse came to mind soon there after, and I realized...The Lord IS GOOD. <br /><br />He is good, for working out our insurance plan to be able to deliver at this hospital with a neonatal unit...it is the only hospital in our area, and it is known for having an excellent neonatal unit.<br /><br />He is good, for giving my doctor the wisdom to talk to me about the possibility of my baby having problems if we delivered too early on September 15th, (the original plan)...and how we should wait until the 22nd instead.<br /><br />He is good, for giving me a very strong husband...who is amazing when I am tired and emotional.<br /><br />He is good, for giving us a very healthy baby...with a very common problem...<br /><br />And although it is difficult to watch her in the NICU...and it is not where I would prefer her to be... may I say<br /><br />He is good, for putting us in a place, where she can receive the care her little lungs need right now.<br /><br />He is good for giving us nurses in the NICU, who have worked with neonate babies for over 20 years...very comforting to me, especially since this is a common problem...they have worked with this condition many, many times.<br /><br />He is good..in His creation of a little baby, the wonders of the body, how it all works together in order....simply amazing how HE put us together.<br /><br />And one last time..."The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble, and He knoweth them that trust in HIM." God is good.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-38543535611307269492009-09-22T20:44:00.003-04:002009-09-22T21:06:56.923-04:00Hannah Grace is here!To all of my friends in blog-land..SHE IS HERE!<br /><div style="text-align: left;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ6i5eQclG9oNBVEodkCZMAfzb3GTEVbAKXiCmNuBUnC1T2olpmmzvIJEpDPbaprtaGzKmBuTiYh-1Q8HKj43_fBuYFdnLbdllBXiFrH0lP3IN7XYlWumLpFwD35yRRDUiI2Bhtd0Mpzw/s1600-h/hannah.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 179px; height: 136px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ6i5eQclG9oNBVEodkCZMAfzb3GTEVbAKXiCmNuBUnC1T2olpmmzvIJEpDPbaprtaGzKmBuTiYh-1Q8HKj43_fBuYFdnLbdllBXiFrH0lP3IN7XYlWumLpFwD35yRRDUiI2Bhtd0Mpzw/s400/hannah.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5384462861610685682" border="0" /></a><br /></div>Hannah Grace Arthur arrived at 7:53am weighing 8lbs. 3oz., a "small baby" for me. The c-section went well...no problems or complications. When Hannah was born, she did need quite a bit of suctioning, as she had a lot of fluid inside of her lungs. This is pretty normal with c-section babies I am told. The fluid was clear, which is good too. Her breathing was shallow, and her oxygen levels are low, so they put her in the neo-natal unit and have been giving her oxygen. They also started her on a precautionary anti-biotic just in case the fluid does not clear up and she develops pneumonia. SHE DOES NOT HAVE PNEUMONIA...but it is a precautionary measure.<br /><br />I have not been able to hold her yet. This is very hard for me. They do not want me nursing her until her oxygen levels are back up. This too, is difficult. Everything in me wants to go to her, scoop her up in my arms, nuzzle her sweet little neck, whisper loving words in her ear, and give her some warm Mommy's milk to fill her little belly. At this point though, I am not able to go anywhere either...I am still very dizzy even when sitting up. So here I am, without my little baby. And there she is...without her Mommy.<br /><br />Please pray specifically....<br />That her oxygen levels would go up.<br />That I will be able to nurse her tomorrow.<br /><br />Thank you all...<br />AmyAmy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-11416548158543758262009-09-14T00:44:00.003-04:002009-09-14T01:02:20.698-04:00Mother of all living...EveAs my time for this new life draws nearer, my mind seems to wander to far off places and ponder questions I will never know the answers to. I was thinking tonight of Eve. <br /><br />The Bible teaches that before the fall of man, that God walked in the garden with Adam and Eve, they talked and spent time together. After the fall, Adam and Eve were banished from the garden. We know that God still talked with them to some extent, because God asked Cain about Abel. We just don't know how often He talked with them, or what He actually said.<br /><br />I was thinking about Eve getting ready to have her first child. Did she know there was a baby inside of her? I wonder if she thought that she would have a full grown person...birthed from her body? Did she know how it would happen? Did she know how long she was to be pregnant? Did she think perhaps she was sick...that she was dying? When labor began, did she even understand what was taking place?<br /><br />I think that from her watching the animals give birth, she may have had some idea. Let's face it though, some animals give birth to several babies at once! Did Eve think she would have a litter of humans? I just wonder, how much she knew...and how much she didn't!<br /><br />At the end of my pregnancies, I always feel like I don't want to go another day pregnant!! I wonder if Eve even knew how long she had? Did God teach her all the details? Was she informed? <br /><br />I don't know any of these answers, but I do know, I'm glad I'm not Eve!!Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-32612451409271690792009-09-10T22:59:00.003-04:002009-09-10T23:14:11.257-04:00Ellie is now 2!!<span style="text-decoration: underline;">Although I am preparing for a new baby girl coming soon...I cannot help but remember when my Ellie was born. Here are some of my favorite pictures of her just two short years ago...</span><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-w-fmqU5NJn5CNh0RZNUEVE0ZLaqdBEyXk3yDUvIbOuiEeNon9ifmrmpGX1B51LjRz67HIjZigorN1UDv73yY5gIHt45KkMCwNV6Z9tVsUoG6w-6qe5U2JlErIX595kJVMUwwyQoXPA/s1600-h/PIC_0040.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp-w-fmqU5NJn5CNh0RZNUEVE0ZLaqdBEyXk3yDUvIbOuiEeNon9ifmrmpGX1B51LjRz67HIjZigorN1UDv73yY5gIHt45KkMCwNV6Z9tVsUoG6w-6qe5U2JlErIX595kJVMUwwyQoXPA/s400/PIC_0040.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380040823607013714" border="0" /></a>Can you believe all that hair???<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidWtPVLR7gJflL3nQY4uL5Mcixl5rL0mO2rOUroERSwNb-DTQFen5jEFtN7ToSU8jAVyH15Koi2fv5KIWFrMKyKJwr4GAEg6veV_2WnYeHtR_2fsQTkimSvzR34vVFVwSKj0EZFKeHQgg/s1600-h/101_0769.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidWtPVLR7gJflL3nQY4uL5Mcixl5rL0mO2rOUroERSwNb-DTQFen5jEFtN7ToSU8jAVyH15Koi2fv5KIWFrMKyKJwr4GAEg6veV_2WnYeHtR_2fsQTkimSvzR34vVFVwSKj0EZFKeHQgg/s400/101_0769.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380041956451729090" border="0" /></a><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgANaFFUYaZsyFwihnrn_l3J4PdJS25iwNjljCdPOwrnOwKQaW-G3UJqvuqJuic11gvWg12inGK6lho5peXqhaYjaJiFnMlU1nxyYYy-oou03Hu8B5rFOtsG-dMr9DokhaTR2oKWlfaUPQ/s1600-h/Elliesleep.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgANaFFUYaZsyFwihnrn_l3J4PdJS25iwNjljCdPOwrnOwKQaW-G3UJqvuqJuic11gvWg12inGK6lho5peXqhaYjaJiFnMlU1nxyYYy-oou03Hu8B5rFOtsG-dMr9DokhaTR2oKWlfaUPQ/s400/Elliesleep.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380040837886330082" border="0" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIR1KgoJZq2tKQnG7dVR-UXnyoraTZueH18oVa0Um7GXKtBz_gD2vP8gu1zw7IDKHIjCZWtc7Ckdu77lFPJQ8i3fuCGJHzBwEuLX0vI1PbcN_WgyaJ0OhkRFsbswOcTjQCl0LeOAGpgaE/s1600-h/PIC_0007.JPG"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIR1KgoJZq2tKQnG7dVR-UXnyoraTZueH18oVa0Um7GXKtBz_gD2vP8gu1zw7IDKHIjCZWtc7Ckdu77lFPJQ8i3fuCGJHzBwEuLX0vI1PbcN_WgyaJ0OhkRFsbswOcTjQCl0LeOAGpgaE/s400/PIC_0007.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5380040836179789362" border="0" /></a>Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-38850037483537173172009-09-03T20:06:00.003-04:002009-09-03T20:30:07.447-04:00MemoriesThe closer I get to my due date, the more my mind wanders back to when Ellie was born. I've wondered before if all moms do this. With Ellie's birth, there was no way I could've known beforehand, just exactly what I was about to face.<br /><br />Our first day home from the hospital, we pulled up and the boys had colored signs and taped them to the outside of our house. There were flowers, and smiley faces, all welcoming home their new baby sister. The door was even decorated. When I brought her in, no sooner had I sat down and the boys were hauling into the living room her bassinet, showing her where her bed would be. Of course they all wanted to hold her again. After all the commotion had settled down, I nursed her and then she went into a seizure. I yelled for Kevin to come and see...QUICK!! When she started turning blue, I ran into my room and fell on my knees with her crying and screaming, "NOT MY BABY GIRL...NO!!!" I really thought she was dying. I laid her on her side, and Kevin's Mom and I started rubbing her back and patting her...all the while she was blue and convulsing. I saw my boys at the door, and asked Kevin's Dad to take them outside, so they didn't have to see this. Out they went. What I found out later, to this day brings tears to my eyes.<br /><br />When the boys went outside, they knew something was wrong. They walked out onto the sidewalk and looked at each other. Derek, my oldest, was 9 at the time. He told us later that a Patch the Pirate song came to his mind, and he remembered Patch saying, "Well, when you don't know what else to do, just pray." So he looked at his brothers, ages 7,5 and 3 and said, "C'mon boys, let's go pray." And my little men, went to the side of the house, got on their knees, and asked God to help their baby sister. <br /><br />Inside...as Kevin was on the phone with 911, and I was crying and patting Ellie's back...slowly she started taking small gasps of air. The color began to return to her face...and soon she was breathing again. I had no idea my boys were outside praying. How thankful I am that their Daddy had taught them to pray for people who were sick and to pray for their healing.<br /><br />The next few days were a whirlwind of tests and tears. I could write of many things that happened...the emotions, the struggle, my baby. In the end we found out she had epilepsy. After a slight reaction to a medicine she was on, we finally found some that worked well for her. She was on the seizure medicine for 8 months, retested, and had outgrown the epilepsy. She is fine now. <br /><br />As I prepare for this new baby coming and I remember and go through the feelings once more, the mental image of my boys praying for their sister is permanently stamped upon my mind. I know that "As for God, His way is perfect."<br /><br />"Lord, help me to trust You and to have the strength to face whatever You may bring my way."Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-6052763091330959702009-08-27T22:26:00.004-04:002009-08-27T22:29:13.780-04:00Motherhood(Once again, I have written my thoughts a photo has evoked within me. It is posted also on the blog "A thousand words and then some" on my sidebar.)<br /><br />Ahh motherhood. Who knew what you would require of me? Tales and dreams of chubby little ones surrounding me on my bed, as I read them story books with colorful pictures. Fantasies of dancing around outside in the rain...my immature longings of motherhood. They captivated me. My innermost desires from the time I knew about having babies was to hold my own precious little ones. Kissing their little chubby cheeks...and tucking their smiling faces into a cozy bed at night, in a beautiful nursery,that I had designed myself and sewn together with love.<br /><br />But Motherhood...you required so much more. More than I ever thought of. You greeted me on a married college students budget...where the corner of our kitchen became my adorable nursery. It consisted of a crib, a shelf, and hand me down bedding. So soon thereafter you greeted me once more, then again and again and again...and I now I am anticipating your return so soon. The blissful dreams of being surrounded by children has become my reality. Instead of happy children reading storybooks, some nights you have given me pillowfights instead. Dancing in the rain has become waterfights and waterballoons. Happy children sometimes squabble and fight, and my patience is tested. I never knew it would be this way. My dreams only included perfect children, and a perfect mother. You have shown me, I am not perfect. I get tired and worn out, and I don't want to read one more book...I just want to sleep. Yet, how much more fun is it to sleep with a cherished little one by your side...than to sleep all alone?<br /><br />Motherhood...you demand much, but you give so much more. You give me the pleasure of getting honey on my face, through the kiss of a toddler. The laughter of a child...finally getting a knock-knock joke. The awe of a child seeing some insect for the first time...and it's all for me to enjoy.<br /><br />My dreams may have been too rosy. My expectations of you unrealistic at times. Yet my love for you, Motherhood, grows with each little babe that comes to me. How wonderful life is, with you by my side.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5318958568626611052.post-3967520083891722482009-08-25T23:36:00.002-04:002009-08-25T23:48:37.694-04:00My big helpers!!Kevin left 2 days ago, to make a trip to Belize. His main purpose while down there is to secure housing for us when we move in November. I am anxiously awaiting an e-mail with pictures!<br /><br />The morning he left I sat the boys down for a chat. I told them that I am very pregnant right now, and I cannot do all that I normally do...as quickly as I normally do, and that I needed them to help me out. I gave each boy 2 simple chores. Derek (10) is to help with dishes, and to help David with his chores. Joey, (8) cleans the bathroom and his bedroom, David (6) is to vacume the dining room and living room, and to pick up things in the living room that do not belong. Many toys and coloring things tend to accumulate in the living room...thus Derek was assigned to help David, if the clutter was too overwhelming. Nathan, (4) is to pick up the shoes at the door and put them away, and to help Mommy get the clothes out of the dryer. <br /><br />I also told them I was going to make a chart to check off their jobs. On the chart next to their name is a blank square. In that blank square I am keeping track of anything they do EXTRA each day that I do not have to ask them to do. They may not come up to me and TELL me what they have done, I must notice it on my own. Each mark will count as a merit. At the end of the 10 days, whichever child has the most merits will go out with Mommy on a special date, and will get a special toy. <br /><br />Let me tell you...it has been truly amazing! I was only up for 15 minutes, and went to my room to get something. Derek had already went in there and made up my bed! After breakfast this morning while everyone was busy with their chores, Joey grabbed a broom and began to sweep the kitchen floor. I walked into Ellie's room to get something, and David was in there tidying up, and then he vacumed everyone's bedroom! They really like this!! And it sure makes things a little bit easier on me!<br /><br />I usually take one of the boys with me at some time during the week when Kevin is home. They all seem to enjoy time out with just Mom. I really am amazed at how well they like this little merit contest.Amy Suehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16040424438186985024noreply@blogger.com5